The Snowman who had no Friends.

Me and my friends wrote tons of these on tiny slips of paper while we should be studying. they were basically tongue-in-cheek style children's stories.

And if you helped write this, I'm looking at YOU.  Thank you vury much

Fancy Restaurant

Here is the full story of my adventures with a fancy restaurant.

We arrive late... fashionably late

I walk in and see an (creepy) elderly woman so i be polite and hold open the door. This is before i see her face.

I see a lot of people surrounding some attraction so i see what is the matter, but as soon as I see it i wish i hadn't. Its a scary looking doll that has already given me multiple nightmares

I am a wee bit' underdressed for the occasion but then I see a creepy Snooki look-a-like

The snooki look-a-like

There is a small child who seems to be making out with the carpet.

His hair makes him look like Shawn White

I see some italian men who have a conversation in a language I call "hat-tippity boopity-boppyish"

We finally get our seat and I am already disappointed. There is a table mat but it doesn't have any maze, crayons or word searches. I am disappoint.

I eat bread quietly...

 The waiter comes up and asks "is everything to your liking" i always say yes but i secretly have always wanted to say no and proceed to angrily yell gibberish at him until i am "escorted" out of the restaurant.

We order this "tower" of food expecting something small but then they bring us this.

We order dessert but after that tower it seems so big I had a mini-stroke

When we leave I notice the music and I suddenly feel the need to skat so I do and we drive home in silence.


P.S.S. Most likely no post for a while. VACATION

Toasts of the world

TOASTS OF THE WORLD

This one took a while to muster up all these stereotypes but I do plan on making more.

The normal toast

P.S. There will probably be less words than usual

                                                     British toast

Canadian Toast

                                                    American Toast

Russian Toast

What better way to ruin toast than diluting it with outdated stereotypes

Superintendent traumatizing field-trip

A couple of you have been asking me what the superintendent tramatizing experience was so here it is (isn't)

She was moving along, browsing the numerous views

But then something horrible happened

EVIL SPACE MEN (from space) invaded!

The space men started attacking. Hope seemed grim





















Thats right. they murdered the Cherry Jelly they were planning on eating for lunch

But then she (or he) pulled out their handgun and gunned the spacemen down

But everyone still went home hungry. THE END

RANT

ITS RANTING TIME!

OK so if you enjoy field trips raise your hand. Now you should realize that your alone at your computer and you don't need to raise your hand and most likely look foolish so awkwardly put your hand down.

This is my interpretation of our superintendent

(i don't even know if they're a woman or not)

So i guess (well just call "it") was in some crazy traumatizing accident when she was a kid so I guess she doesn't like field trips.

So we were planning on going on a Field trip to the skating rink
It would been awesome judging from this picture in my mind.

But a week before the trip it was cancelled

So this post was not meant to "demean" the school or or insult anyone
but i just want to get the word out to all the 'murricans out there

Super Bowl

Since tonight's the super-bowl and I'm lazy and i couldn't come up with a full fledged "post" I decided to just leave you with this

It's also sort've a sneak preview to the next actual post

Warning another post about food

WARNING. ANOTHER POST ABOUT FOOD. WARNING



I've been a vegetarian for 2 years now and hers the story about how I became this way (FLASHBACK NOISES)


It started awhile ago when I wanted to go to the grocery store. But then I saw this.

I asked "whats that daddy?" and he just said "oh, thats hamburger"



I was traumatized.


ZOOM FORWARD

Then in second grade I bit into a school chicken nugget and i saw this

It was blue and creepy and it reminded me of aliens





ZOOM FORWARD EVEN MOAR



I was minding my own business browsing teh Facebooks
And an add for a youtube video page came up

I clicked it and saw this video

But the major factor in it all was this. I hated my parent cooking

And so I became a vegetarian

Coffee Flavored ice-cream

Its a universal truth. COFFEE FLAVORED ICE CREAM SUCKS. I mean, it tastes like someone took a bowl of chocolate ice-cream and said " Hey carl, lets get chocolate ice-cream, take out all the chocolate and replace with the scraps left behind from the coffee maker in the break room

Whenever someone brings me Coffee a little conversation goes on in my mind...

In the near future (when I'm most obviously president) I'll pass a law successfully banning all coffee flavored ice-cream. You just wait

Gamestop

   

My reaction while in the middle of GameStop holding skyrim high above my head with pride

                      My reaction when I actually play the game

Now my view of other games

And when i go a long time without playing Skyrim because of all the boring stuff (homework, saving the bujuniverse etc.)